i am tired. exhausted. i’ve had a full day. and i just want to rest.
these are my favorite excuses to push God off until tomorrow. it’s truly hard to think of anyone but yourself when you’re dead tired at 10:30 and want nothing else but a nice night’s sleep.


“let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others” phil 2:4


john 15:12-14 tells us how we should love as he loved us. and there is no greater love than laying down your own interests for another brother. if you do, the Lord calls you His friend.
someone go get the aloe.

it is SO DIFFICULT to just sit and listen in silence to God. to read a full page of a devotional.. it’s so much harder than it looks. but gosh, facebook is so easy to scroll through. before i know it, an hour has passed and the bags under my eyes grew new bags.

how??? how does this happen repeatedly? daily!
if the devil can’t make you bad, he’ll make you busy. 

a good friend once told me that, and it has made so much sense to me. i know black and white, right from wrong, but goodness i sure can get caught up in social media or procrastination. i push God off thinking that sleep will cure my empty heart just to find myself the next morning even emptier than the night before.

don’t listen to his lies.

i certainly believe that the devil works through social media, procrastination and sleepiness. he will persuade you to keep scrolling or to keep sleeping when he knows just how beneficial that time would be spent with the Loving Father.
i want to pause to say this: i am SO grateful for a God filled to the brim with grace, forgiveness and permanent satisfaction. i can search for years looking for things to fill my heart, but one day in his courts amounts to much more than thousands elsewhere. He is a God of redemption, love, and pursuance. He longs for your heart. i truly believe His heart mourns the days i push Him to the corner. sometimes i imagine Jesus with tears rolling down His cheeks waiting for the day I come back. not that i run away.. but i step away. and i shouldn’t.

God, I am so sorry. For prioritizing other things over our relationship. Please forgive me.
i look back on the night God encountered me in a way that was totally out of my comfort zone.

my family and i were having a nice dinner, and i ended up having a discussion about God with them. (this seems to happen every time we eat dinner together.. PK probs.. anyways)

my heart was so broken. the devil had convinced me that His word was rubbish, and that God lied. to me. God. lying. Seems totally dumb, right? Not possible. And most of all, I thought I would’ve been exempt from thinking such idiotic things. Think again.

my family firmly believes in the active gifts of the Spirit including tongues and interpretation. but at a dinner table? you’d think it’s just for church.

note to self: don’t put God in a box (or a building)

My mom prayed over our family after our discussion, and through that entire prayer, I kept thinking “it’s all lies. i’ll believe it later, but not now. God isn’t for me right now. He hasn’t come to rescue me. Why would he? He lies.” My mom finished praying, and my dad felt a pressing on his heart. He looked at me and mom and basically said God had given him a message in tongues, and he wanted us to pray for the interpretation.


So, as any person would.. we began praying for the interpretation.

now here’s something funny.. my moron self was waiting on some big booming voice saying “I love you sayeth the Lord,” and I’m sure He could do that. I mean He can do anything. But that was not His message lol..


Mom didn’t have the interpretation after dad spoke a message in tongues, but Dad ended up having the interpretation as well.

and you ain’t gonna believe this.

this is what God said to me.

“God is not a man that He should lie

okay.. that’s all. Thanks God. Got it.

Nope. He is not finished. I’ve learned that when God makes a point, he makes a point.”

All other voices in this world have the capacity to lie. Satan is the father of lies. If he opens his mouth, it is a lie; it is his native tongue. But when I speak, it is not to be doubted, but you can bank on it, and trust in it because the Lord has spoken it. When I speak, it is Truth.”

wow. right?

it can definitely be hard to believe. the whole God speaking through us thing is a big thought to grasp. but it’s very evident in the bible that God is more than able to speak through us in many ways: one being tongues and interpretation.

for further clarification: the beginning chapters of acts tell about the encounter the disciples had with God. this being the same encounter we, His disciples, have today!
but seriously, the Lord encountered me. He pursued me. Reassured me that He was never giving up on me. That His word is not to be doubted, and that He is a sovereign Father who doesn’t lie to His children.

That was both the lowest and the highest moment I can remember in my walk with Christ. In those moments before this encounter, I slacked in devotions. I was broken-hearted. Very faint. Constantly tired. Untrustworthy towards the most steadfast and constant Truth I knew. And even still, He met with me at the kitchen table, and told me He would never lie to me.

That’s a God. That’s a Father.

Here’s my point:

The devil can say SO many things to try to bring you down, to rock your faith, and to distract your focus from Him into other worldly things, but.. as a Child and Coheir of Christ, you must see the devils words for what they are: lies. 

The devil has only come to “steal, kill, and destroy” (john 10:10) and he wants nothing more than to take your joy, peace, and trust.

So the next time you find yourself debating on skipping that devotion or procrastinating until tomorrow, remember his schemes and make sure you discipline yourself to spend that time with your Father (who quite frankly looks forward to His daily time with you). He’s a big ole teddy bear who just wants to wrap you in His fuzzy, fluffy love every chance He gets. So let Him.

Stop and rest. It’s okay.




2 thoughts on “busy

  1. Hi Alex!
    I am so touched by this post. There have been many times where I put off talking to god and pursuing a relationship with him and my days were so horrible.
    Thank you so much for sharing!
    I am also new to blogging and I would definitely love it if you checked out my blog as well. Youngishmama.com

    Liked by 1 person

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